When you hear the word inevitable, what are your thoughts? My personal thoughts go hand and hand with the definition which is something that is certain to happen; unavoidable or a situation that is unavoidable. When we consider the word inevitable and we think about life, I believe Benjamin Franklin nailed it on the head with his quote "nothing is certain except death and taxes.
If you can think of one of the saddest days of your life, I think we would all agree that it's when a loved one passes. This year has been rough for everyone and we still have weeks to go before the end. I, along with many of you know of someone that is battling the pending loss or have lost someone this year. Others are or have been in their feelings due to birthdays, anniversaries, or just day to day living that has made them miss that loved one and wish that they could have that one last conversation to say what they have accomplished or to seek that wise counsel that they once received.
To all of the religious readers, I am quite sure you prayed and asked others to pray for that loved one to be healed but to no avail you watched that love one suffer and continue to be in pain. How did you handle that situation? Did you sit in self-pity and hopelessness? Did you blame God for the issues that your loved one was going through? Did you express your impatience? To the non-religious readers, did you express these same feelings to whomever you believe in or blame the doctors, yourself, or the person for what they were going through? Did it ever occur to you that you were being selfish in the fact that you wanted that person to hold on even though they said they were tired or ready to give up? This is a hard pill to swallow knowing that we won't be able to communicate with them but it is reasonable for us to understand that we know that they won't be in pain anymore.
Have you ever sat and thought why we mourn at death? Is it that empty feeling you will have with their passing? Is it you won't have that advice or caring ear anymore? Maybe you have gotten accustomed to that smile, laugh, voice, or that familiarity that you have grown to love. Whatever it is, you just know it will be or is missed.
My granny told us that if we didn't buy flowers for her while she is living then there is no need for them when she is gone. The realization that "for death begins with life's first breath, and life begins at touch of death," stated by John Oxenham. This is a tough concept to accept as we celebrate the birth of a baby but mourn at the death no matter the age.
So what should we do with these facts? First enjoy, love, and make memories with the ones we love each and every day. Express your love to them through words, gifts, listening, talking, or whatever it is that makes both of you happy. Grieving and mourning is nothing that will get any easier, but knowing that there is no malice, ill will, and everyone has been forgiven provides a sense of peace in both of you. Take the time to say "I LOVE YOU" because tomorrow is not promised to any of us. #SPEAK2MYHEART